My Wedding Week....A Running Diary Part 1

Saturday night around 9:00 p.m. I fell asleep not to wake up for another 12 hours. I drank 7 or 8 too many Bud Lights on Friday night resulting in my Saturday being spent doing nothing but watching 2nd Round of the NCAA Tournament. After just reading that sentence over I don’t think I would change a thing. That was a well spent day! Since I got plenty of sleep on Saturday night I woke up on Sunday with a little extra bounce in my step. Celia & I had previously entertained the idea of leaving for Iowa a few days earlier than planned but had not yet solidified a decision. When we woke up on Sunday it was settled, we were leaving........Only if we could be ready by noon. It was 12:45 p.m. when we stepped out the door and I should have thrown in the towel right there.

It is often believed that your gut feeling, that first initial thought is your best, most concise thought you have. Mine was, leave by noon or do not leave at all. Reason being is the drive typically takes about 8 hours; and with a infant on board extra time in the car is comparable to an extra hour with your pants around your ankles waiting for the doctor to grace you with his presence. Sorry, slight tangent there. Well I bend the rules a little bit and think no harm no foul. The foreshadowing here is thunderously loud as something tragic is bound to happen. Just once more for good measure, we left Radcliff, KY at 12:45 p.m.

We get gas at 1:00 p.m. at the local Wal Mart and drive through the Wilson Gate to enter Fort Knox. I had left our portable DVD player in my office and wanted to grab it for the trip to help pass the time. Got it! I hop back in the car and we are on our way. Or so I thought.

"Did you grab the camera?" I asked.
"No. I thought you did." Celia replied.
"No I never did, I couldn’t find it. Let’s go back to the apartment and get it."
On our way back to the apartment I realized I did not have my ATM card either.

"By the way, we forgot the ATM card too. That would have sucked."

About 1:30 p.m. we get back to our apartment and begin looking for the camera. No luck; this thing wasn’t anywhere to be found. We look a few more minutes and decide to give up and hop back in the car with hopes of finally beginning. I look at the clock and it is now 1:45 p.m. We would have been on the road more than an hour, halfway to Indianapolis and here we were, just leaving our apartment. One hour and forty five minutes later than we planned.

About 2:00 p.m. Jadon passes out with his bottle in his mouth. Priceless.

A bit later we were on the Gene Snyder Freeway in Louisville and began watching Super Bad when we noticed our attachable speakers didn’t work. We pull in to a local Big K Mart and pick up some AAA batteries and some headphones. Our logic told us this would be 15 minutes top and we would be on the road. We were right and it was back to the road.

About 3:00 p.m. we were crossing over into Indiana and again Jadon was passed out begging for his picture to be taken. Since we couldn’t find our camera I reached for my phone. Shit! I can’t find my phone. I grab Celia’s phone and call it........NOTHING! Five minutes go by; I call it again......NOTHING!

"Baby I don’t know what to tell you. Your phone was right there when you got in the car. It has to be in here." Celia said.

"Celia, you would hear my phone ring if we called it. I bet I dropped in the K Mart parking lot."
"I don’t think you did, it has to be in here....."
"God damn it. My phone just called your phone."
Here it was, 3 hours after we planned on leaving and we just crossed in to Indiana and now had to back track 25 miles to go to K Mart. Celia’s eyes could have burned a hole through me! I finally get my phone and was informed that after 3 1/2 hours and 35 miles traveled it is now my turn to drive.

What a day. Losing so much time the only logical thing to do is when a new driver takes seat is to pick up the speed in attempts to make up any time. Now while the foreshadowing here is getting busted by the local coppers I am happy to say that was not the case. I indeed made up time. Lots of it. I did too, until I got to mile marker 40 just barely in to Indiana.

We were at the tale end of Super Bad when the two friends were lying in their sleeping bags telling each other how much they loved each other. "I just want to shout it from my roof top! I love you!" That scene is an all time comedy classic. Right about there you can hear the tire go flat. SHIT! The word "shit" was used a good number of times yesterday.

I pull off on I-65 and examine the flat tire. Rear passenger and I had pulled over in the left lane of the interstate. There’s no way I’m going to survive this tire change. Some religious sap all sauced up from an Easter dinner was destined to take me out. Happy Easter to Andrew, Celia and Jadon!

Just to recap, we have a flat tire 40 miles in to Indiana at 4:45 p.m. and are hoping to get a tire changed. We hope to get a tire changed. We hope to get a tire changed on (1) a Sunday, (2) Easter Sunday and (3) at 5:00 p.m. or later. Are you out of your mind? No place in America would service us under those conditions.

Just for the crap of it we drove to exit 50B at the North Vernon/Seymor exit and found a local Wal Mart. There was hope! Wal Mart had some of the worst working conditions known to man. If any corporation would succumb their Tire & Lube employees to working past 5:00 p.m. on Easter Sunday it would have to be Wal Mart right? BINGO! Wal Mart kept their employees there until 6:00 p.m. 6:00 P.M.!!!!! On Easter Sunday Tire & Lube workers were on the clock until 6:00 p.m. I thought only Interstate Porn Stores had more ridiculous hours than that; I was wrong.

As soon as we began talking to the representative we couldn’t help but telling our story. For starters, what are the chances anybody would have been working? Seriously stop and consider the situation. Only Wal Mart!!!! However we began telling our story about attempting to travel back to Iowa to get married, love conquers all, the whole 9 yards. Whatever we said worked because we got our tire changed and were on our way.

Once back in the car something didn’t sit right with me. That was the vulnerability of our situation and how exploitable it was. I began driving and started to think that in a few days/weeks some advertising associate who has ties to Wal Mart would contact me and want to use our story for the new summer commercial.

Imagine this, a soft voice begins talking: "It was Easter Sunday when bad luck bit this family traveling across country. They were traveling back home to celebrate their love for one another when suddenly their tire went flat. They thought they were doomed. Who would help them on Easter Sunday? Then they went to Wal Mart and found our employees eagerly waiting to assist them on their magical voyage.

I mean our story was a Hallmark version for a Wal Mart commercial for the ages. So do not be surprised if you see this story pop up down the road.

And after that I am happy to say that we did not encounter any more problems. We finally rolled into Monroe around 12:15 a.m. That is nearly 4 hours and 15 minutes longer than it normally would have. Oh wait, I forgot we lost an hour crossing times zones. So make it 5 hours and 15 minutes late. And that was only Sunday. Only God knows what the rest of my wedding week will bring. Until I update you all again I want to leave you with some words of wisdom from my good friend Vanilla Ice.

"If my rhyme was a drug I’d sell it by the gram." That’s very deep stuff.


Andrew

Yes I Had A Baby - The Jadon Alan Blog

"So I guess that answers the question if I'm sterile or not huh?"

That was one of the first things I said to Celia after she told me she was pregnant.

April 7, 2007 8:15 a.m.

It is Saturday and Andrew rolls out of bed finally getting a good night of rest. For the previous 5 days I had been out in the field getting just a few hours of sleep.

April 6, 2007. I make my way home from the field about 6:00 p.m. and give Celia a call to see how she was doing. We were set to have Jadon in 5 days on the 11th so I knew she was very uncomfortable. We talk casually about the stuff I did in the field and I ask about her. Nothing special. I let her go because I had not showered in 5 days and tell her I will call her later in the evening.

April 7, 2007 8:15 a.m.

I wake up checking my phone and see something extremely unusual. I had 20+ alerts, such as missed calls and text messages.

April 6, 2007 8:30 p.m.

I call Celia earlier than I had expected. I let her know that I'm dead tired and going to go to bed. I let her know that she can call me later if she wants but do not recommend it. The logic being that she would get upset with me if she called and I was asleep on the phone with her. If anybody has ever had it happen to them it is annoying as hell.

April 2--April 6, 2007

I am out in the field and I have my phone. Cell phones in the field were forbidden as we were prepping to fight the damn dirty Al Faruq (See Blog Earlier Today). Andrew decides he is a rebel and brings his phone with the logic being that "To hell with it. My girl is pregnant and I want to check up on her throughout the week." I stand by my decision. The catch to all of this was whenever my phone was on the ringer was on silent. It would be a kick in the nuts to get caught with my cell phone ringing.

April 7, 2007 8:20 a.m.

I open up my phone and begin checking all of my alerts that I missed. I had multiple calls from Celia within minutes. I already knew. I scroll down further skipping a few of the alerts to a text message. It confirmed what I already suspected. "Pick up your phone! The baby's coming tonight." I instantly begin to panic. Then I saw what had happened. My phone was still on silent. I had been to tired to turn it back on.

I begin making phone call after phone call. I call my military instructors and inform them and then I get a hold of Celia. She had already had Jadon. I had slept through the birth of my first child. My heart sunk. As soon as I could I got on the road and made my way to Iowa to see this when I arrived.

Well he wasn't wearing this outfit but you get the point.

I spend the next 3 days holding this beautiful baby experiencing feelings that I had never felt before in my life. The first time he got to me wasn't when I was holding him for the first time, no. It was at the end of the night when I was getting ready to push him down to the nurses. He had his eyes open, both arms in the air and grabbed my finger. I cried.

April 10, 2007

I have to leave Iowa and head to Fort Knox so I can embark on a journey that would allow me to write my blog from earlier today. This means I have to say goodbye to my new family. I don't know if many people can truly understand just how difficult that was.

April 24, 2007 8:40 p.m.

I am counting down the days now. I have 3 more days until I am able to see Jadon Alan once again. I know what many of you may be thinking. Damn this asshole is talking a lot about his kid showing a lot of pictures. You know what? You're right. Look, I'll call a spade a spade and truth be told; I have a very good looking baby. Clearly he got that DNA from his mother but I will take credit.

In all seriousness now. I know it will only be 3 more days until that little 7 pound blessing melts my heart once again. He has made me feel something that I had only heard about and I pledge my life to give him the best life possible. I love you Jadon Alan.

Meeting Nick Collison

In June of 1999 Nick Collison was a household name among basketball fans in the state of Iowa and Lawrence, Kansas. He was 2-time Mr. Basketball in the state and a McDonald's All American. In June of 1999 Nick woke up thinking this would be any other typical summer day. What Nick did not know was that three douche bags from Monroe, Iowa would be in Iowa Falls for the day; and two of them needed something to do during the day.

Myself, Matt Keucker and Jeff Shannon arrived in Iowa Falls around 8:30-9:00 a.m. Matt & I were tagging along with Jeff who was on a college visit to Ellsworth C.C. Upon Jeff's departure to meet with his academic advisor, Matt & I were left in the big town with nothing to do and only Jeff's car as sense of hope.

The two of us began walking around campus seeing the different sites. We "broke" into the gym, checked out the weight room, played some basketball for a little bit but began to bore ourselves to death. We needed something to do and then it dawned on me!

"Matt, Nick Collison lives in Iowa Falls!" I said.

"Ew, that's right he does. We should pay him a visit!" Matt said with genuine optimism.

"You know where he lives?"

"How the hell would I know!"

"Come on, there's gotta be a phone book around here somewhere!"

We found the phonebook and scrolled through until we found the only Collison. We ripped the page out of the phonebook and hopped in the car with no clear direction.

"We need to go to a gas station to find out where Carson Ave. is." Matt told me as he was pulling into Kum & Go.

"Alright. I'll be right back." I told him.

I hopped in the car thinking it would only be minutes before we would be at Nick's house but obviously things did not go as planned. We could not find the street.

"I'll run in and ask for directions, maybe we missed a turn." Matt said.

About a minute later.

"That bitch gave me the same damn directions!" Matt bellered.

After about 30 minutes of driving around we finally found Carson Ave. and the house that Nick Collison grew up in. We were screaming like little school girls but neither one of us had the balls to get out of the car and ring the doorbell. Instead we opted for the next best thing that any typical stalker would do. We circled the block for good 20 minutes hoping to catch any glimpse of Nick. By this time it was pushing noon and we headed back to tell Jeff of our current adventure.

"Why didn't you bastards come and get me. My schedule's not that important!"

Well we dropped Jeff back off so he could do grown up things and Matt & I were back to stalking. We circled around the back of his house and found an alley where is car was parked and even saw his basketball hoop. We took turns getting out of the car and throwin down on Nick Collison's hoop and sped off feeling like we accomplished something great. We continued to drive around discussing the possibilities of walking in Nick's house and playing some video games forgetting that we had not even met the guy yet. Around 2:00 p.m. we went and picked Jeff back up but Jeff had a little surprise for us.

He had been talking to a guy that graduated with Nick and said if we were to call him we could meet him rather than drive around his house like a couple of freaks. Jeff pulled out his phone and it began to ring.

"Hello." The man answered.

"Mr. Collison?" Jeff mumbled.

"This is Nick."

"We're just a couple fans from in state and were wondering if we could stop by to maybe get a pic."

"Yeah that's fine. You know where I live?

Do we know where you live?

"Yeah we have a pretty good idea." Jeff replied.

Looking back on this I can not believe how this may have appeared. How pathetic, how spooky, how big of losers were we?

So we hopped in the car and pulled up in front of the Collison residence. We knock on the door and this enourmous guy comes to the door.

"What's goin on guys?" Nick said.

Wow! Nick Collison talked to us.

"Not to much." Matt says as he helps himself inside Nick's house. Matt basicly walked right in as if he'd known Nick for years. Jeff & I just laughed and followed Matt's lead.

We made some small talk, talked to his mom, got a few things signed and headed out the door to get some pics taken. As were taking the picture I had to ask.

"So I bet you get this sort of thing quite a bit, don't ya?"

Nick laughing, "No. Actually you guys are the first to do this."

All the better. We were the first hapless souls to go knocking and stalking on Nick Collison's door. That has to be something he can't forget.

We made some small talk and hopped back in the car and headed back to Monroe. Obviously we did not do anything productive that day but we drove back with a sense of accomplishment. I was so proud of myself at that moment but looking back now I can not believe I allowed myself to do such a thing. I really don't even know what to think of myself, but it was the most fun we could have had in Iowa Falls that day.

Above all I know this. I am a loser so there is no need in regurgatating that point to me.